If the waiting doesn't kill me...

So, I'm sitting here on my lunch today and decided to check out my agency's website, hoping for good news on quick referrals and adoption completions. While I was surprised that they did indeed have a recent update, this is what I found:

Friday, June 12, 2009
In May, 21 children returned from Russia with their new families!!
We experienced many changes throughout Russia. Additional documents have been required in many regions. The good news is this has not caused any delays.
In many regions, paperwork and procedures required for issuing the child's documents may require longer stays or additional trips. On a positive note, EAC families are maneuvering the system fairly quickly.

So exciting for those 21 children and their families - I am in complete and utter amazement (okay, maybe combined with a bit of jealousy) at the fact that these families have completed their journey. I am also pretty excited to hear that families that have signed with my agency are maneuvering the system pretty quickly. It's one of the reasons I chose this agency - they are well-connected, have contacts in several regions in Russia, and most of the feedback I heard about them was positive and that adoptions are completed well under the specified time lines, which is almost unheard of these days. What I didn't like reading (yeah, the truth hurts sometimes) is that additional paperwork is almost certainly going to be necessary and that procedures are calling for possible additional trips. I am already fairly certain that I will be making 3 trips to Russia of about a week each. I want to be able to use my available vacation and FMLA time to bond with my child, not see the airports around the world. I'm really trying to look at this as positive - heck, I wouldn't be seeing this part of the world if it weren't for my circumstances so its truly quite an opportunity, a gift really, but the gift of time is something I can't hang onto and deliver to my child later. At least I can honestly say it will all be worth it in the end...

It's been almost a week now since I found out that my home study was completed and sent off for apostilling. My coordinator is supposed to call me when she receives it, and then and only then can my documents be sent off to Russia, where I will officially be placed on the waiting list. Yep, more waiting - this time waiting on people who don't know me and most likely will never meet me, to determine my fate and match me with my child-to-be. I've still got my fingers crossed for a quick turnaround, as it truly wrenches my heart to think of my child in an orphanage without me. So while I am selfishly looking for a quick response, trips, and completion of the adoption, it's more than just what I want. I want my child to know that his (or her!) Mommy is out there, she loves him (or her!) already, and is anxiously awaiting the day she can bring him home. That's truly what this process is all about.....