I can hardly believe that today RP and I celebrated our three-year anniversary of our Gotcha Day! It truly has been a whirlwind adventure, filled with lots of laughter, tears, pain, and celebration. One thing that it has not been filled with? Regret. Although the road was long, bumpy, and sometimes seemed insurmountable, I have never looked back at my decision to adopt, or the process itself, with regret. This process made me stronger as an individual, tested my very beliefs and desires, and made me the person I am today.
RP has turned into an amazing little girl. I stared at our Gotcha Day picture today - the one taken outside of Baby Home #1 in Russia, and can clearly see a little girl who is lost, confused, and scared to death. Today she is an outgoing little girl who makes friends wherever she goes and wears Mommy out with her boundless energy. She is sweet and sensitive with a splash of daredevil in her, and she keeps me on my toes! This last year has brought a new school for RP, a new job for Mommy, and soon a new home for us as we move into a new chapter of our lives.
We celebrated our 3 year anniversary with Nana and Papa tonight with a huge home cooked meal, something that I enjoy doing but don't do nearly often enough, and Nana and Papa brought us a beautiful cake that said, "3 years ago today..." Three years ago today I took RP for her first car ride, her first airplane ride, her first night in a hotel, her first bath in a huge bathtub, and most importantly, her first night with her FAMILY. Three years ago today I slept very little as I kept getting up to check on her in her crib, touch her just to make sure I wasn't dreaming, and thanking God for the blessing I was given that day.
I was scared to death that first day, and especially that first night. Three years later that fear has subsided as I realize that parenting is something that you learn as you go, and no one can tell you the "right" way to do things, but that fear never goes away. I still slip into RP's room every night (sometimes several times a night), just to listen to her breathing peacefully as she sleeps, fix her blankets, and kiss that sweet cheek just one more time. I whisper "I love you" into her ear every night before I go to bed, as well as every chance I get during the day.
These last three years have flown by, and I continue to beg for time to slow down so I can enjoy these days with RP. Despite my repeated requests for her to do so, she won't remain my baby forever. In only a few short weeks she will turn 5, and I long to have my baby back and to get an opportunity to relieve these past three years again, but since that isn't going to happen I am going to live for the moment and enjoy watching her continue to grow into an amazing, beautiful, and dynamic little girl.
I love you my little Russian Princess - with all my heart, and all I have to give. You make me proud to be called your Mommy...
